CORDY: I’ve had it with these cheap trash bags! They leak and break and end up costing us more, hum…?
DOYLE: I believe it!
CORDY: Yeah, It was a great audition! I was all about things leaking. How could they not pick me?
DOYLE: They don’t know what they missed.
CORDY: They gave it to a blonde that showed up in a skin-tight leather cat suit. She is supposed to be a housewife. She looked ridiculous. She looked like cat-woman taking out the cat-trash.

DOYLE: It’s all about money. What about friendship and family all those things that are priceless, like they say in those credit card commercial?
Oh, yeah right. You’re a demon of focus. I can see that.

CORDY: Oh god, Angel! It’s so terrible! Oh, my gosh. Don’t even look at me! I am such a mess. I am the lowest of the lowest. And you’re going to want to get my other suitcase out there in the hall.
ANGEL: What happened?
CORDY: My apartment. It’s like the barrio or the projects or whatever, and I live there! I’m the girl from the projects!
ANGEL: What? I don’t know about that.
CORDY: Get this. I tried to call Doyle. I have sunk that low. And there was no answer. So, here I am. Not that you’re the last resort. It’s just that I have nowhere else left to go. Roaches. Live one, dead ones. All skinny feet and creepy antlers.
ANGEL: Antlers?
CORDY: Oh, my god! I wonder how many stowed away in that bag? Also the water is all brown and spurty, and not hot! I am dying for a shower. I actually smell! Smell me. I never smell. I didn’t know I could.  I’m just going to have to stay here until I can find a decent place, however long that takes, and when I do you are completely invited over. Hey, you can just dump my stuff on the couch –or let me have the bed. What ever you feel good about. Also, my suitcase is still out in the hall. Your shower is in here, right? You have mousse?  Of course you do.

DOYLE: Listen, I was wondering if anybody called lately? Maybe asking about me or maybe wanting my address?
CORDY: Oh, yeah. Yesterday your cousin called, with one of those names from your part of England.
DOYLE: My part of England?
CORDY: Conner or Fergus…

GUY: It’s like a community, you know? We share all the upkeep and chores.
CORDY: Oh, my urination just hasn’t been public enough lately.
GUY: Oh, we don’t believe in barriers. It’s the first rule of the great leader. Ah, you can come to the meetings if you want. Every morning at 5:00.
CORDY: Okay that’s just a touch too early for me.
GUY: Oh, you’ll be up. The Chanting starts at 4:00.

CORDY: Okay, just out of curiosity, you said you know a guy?
DOYLE: Finally. What is it with you and Angel? You got to do everything the hard way.
CORDY: First thing hire someone to take out that wall.
DOYLE: I though you said it was perfect.
CORDY: Yes, and part of being perfect is that there being one tiny flaw for me to fix
DOYLE: Ah, must be why you find me so fascinating.

CORDY: I get it. You’re a ghost. You’re dead. Big accomplishment! Move on! You see a light anywhere? Go towards it, okay?

CORDY: Oh my god! Don’t touch that!
DOYLE: I’m just closing these so our boss doesn’t burst into flames, if that’s all right with you?
CORDY: Yeah, I guess.

CORDY: That thing’s been doing that all morning. I think the mantel is uneven.
DOYLE: That thing lunged at me!
ANGEL: What’s going on?
CORDY: Okay, you’re right. It’s not the mantel. It’s a very, very bad trophy.

ANGEL: Come on.
CORDY: I am not giving up this apartment!
ANGEL: It’s haunted.
CORDY: It’s rent controlled!
DOYLE: Cordy, it says ‘die’!
CORDY: Hey, maybe it’s not done. Maybe it’s ‘diet’. That’s friendly. A little judgmental, sure.

KATE: Well, you see the thing about detectives is that they have resumes and business licenses and last names. Pop stars and popes, those are the one-name guys.
ANGEL: You got me. I’m a pope.

MAUDE: You better be sorry, you stupid little bitch.
CORDY: I’m a bitch.
MAUDE: Take off the bed sheets, makes a noose. Go on. It’ll all be over soon.
CORDY: I’m not a snivelling whiny little Cry-Buffy. I’m the nastiest girl in Sunnydale history.  I take crap from no one.”
MAUDE: You are going to make yourself a noose and put it around...
CORDY: Back off! Polygrip. You think you’re bad? Being all mean and haunty? Picking on poor pathetic Cordy? Well, get ready to haul your wrinkly translucent ass out of this place, because lady, the bitch is back.