Ben: I’m Ben. We had Algebra II together last year.
Buffy: Sorry, I pretty much repress anything math-related.

Boy: What happened?
Buffy: What happened? You just went O.J. on your girlfriend!
Boy: This is nuts! I… I don’t know why I got so mad.
Buffy: Because you’re a jerk?

Snyder: I’m sure you know why I asked you here?
Buffy: To thank me?
Snyder: That’s right, I wanna thank you. What would Sunnydale High do without you around to incite mayhem, chaos and disorder?

Willow: So, for next time read the chapters on information grouping and binary coding. I bet you’ll think coding is pretty cool. I mean, if you find two-digit, multi-stacked conversions and primary number clusters a big hoot.

Buffy: I’m telling you, something weird is going on.
Xander: Something weird is going on. Isn’t that our school motto?

Xander: I don’t wanna poo-poo your wiggins, but a domestic dispute, a little case of chalkboard Tourette’s? all sounds like Hellmouth Lite to me.

Willow: Xander, what happened? Did Cordelia win another round in the broom closet?
Xander: You’re just a big bucket of funny, Will.

Willow: A ghost? Cool!
Xander: Oh, no, no. no. no cool. This was no wimpy chain rattler. This was “I’m dead as hell, and I’m not gonna take it anymore.”
Giles: Well, despite the Xander-speak, that’s a fairly accurate definition of a poltergeist.
Xander: I defined something? Accurately? Guess I’m done with the book learning.

Giles: Yes, well, I, uh, I appreciate your thoughts on the matter, I, in fact i… well, I encourage you to, to always, uh, challenge me, uh, when it’s appropriate. You should never be cowed by authority. Except, of course, in this instance, when I am clearly right and you are clearly wrong.

Xander: I know. He’s usually Investigate-Things-From-Every-Boring-Angle guy. Now he’s I-Cling-Onto-My-One-Lame-Idea guy. What gives?

Buffy: Yeah, we need some alternate ghost theories. What do we know?
Xander: Dog spit is cleaner than human.
Buffy: Besides that?

Xander: Your dreams are getting wicked accurate, Buff. You wouldn’t happen to see me coming across some big cash? Or possibly knowing love of a woman? In a full body sense.

Buffy: Who cares what he wants? We need to shut him down before some other innocent guy goes and kills some poor nice girl and then blows his brains out all over the music room wall.
Xander: Okay! Who’s hungry?

Cordelia: I hope you guys aren’t going to the Sadie Hawkins Dance tonight, ‘cause I’m organizing a boycott. Do you realize that the girls have to ask the guys? And pay and everything? I mean, whose genius idea was that?
Xander: Obviously, some hairy-legged feminist.
Cordelia: Really! Well, we need to nip this thing in the bud. I mean, otherwise, things are going to get really scary.

Xander: Nuke the school? I like that.
Willow: Not quite. Exorcism.
Cordelia: Are you crazy? I saw that movie! Even the priest died.

Cordelia: Yeah, what if this mangled triangle thingy doesn’t work?
Willow: Oh! I almost forgot. I made us all scapulas.
Xander: Okay, so we can flip the ghost over when it turns a nice golden brown?
Willow: Scapula, not spatula. Um, you wear it around your neck for protection.
Cordelia: You expect me to wear this? It smells like grandpa breath.

Willow: Everything seems normal. Not a snake, not a wasp.
Cordelia: Yep. School can open again tomorrow.
Xander: Explain to me again how that’s a good thing.

George/Buffy/James: You can’t make me disappear just because you say it’s over.
Ms. Frank/Grace: There’s no way we can be together. No way people will ever understand. Accept it.
George/James: Is that what this is about? What other people think?
Ms Frank/Angel/Grace: No! I just want you to be able to have some kind of normal life. We can never have that. Don’t you see?
George/Buffy/James: I don’t give a damn about a normal life! I’m going crazy not seeing you. I think about you every minute.
Ms Frank/Angel/Grace: I know. But it’s over. It has to be.
Boy/George/Buffy/James: Come back here! We’re not finished! You don’t care anymore, is that it?
Girl/Ms Frank/Angel/Grace: No, it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter what I feel.
Boy/George/Buffy/James: Then tell me you don’t love me. Say it!
Girl/Ms Frank/Angel/Grace: Will that help? Is that what you need to hear? I don’t. I don’t! now let me go.
Boy/George/Buffy/James: No! a person doesn’t just wake up one day and stop loving somebody. Love is forever. I’m not afraid to use it. I swear! If I can’t be with you…
Girl/Ms Frank/Angel/Grace: Oh, my God!
Boy/George/Buffy/James: DON’T WALK AWAY FROM ME, BITCH!
Buffy/James: Stop it! Stop it! Don’t make me!
Angel/Grace: All right. Just… You know you don’t want to do this. Let’s both… just calm down. Now give me the gun.
Buffy/James/George: Don’t! don’t do that, damn it! Don’t talk to me like I’m some dumb/stupid…
Angelus/Grace: James.
Buffy/James: Grace!
Angel/Grace: Don’t do this.
Buffy/James: But-but I killed you.
Angel/Grace: It was an accident. It wasn’t your fault.
Buffy/James: Oh, it is my fault. How could i…
Angel/Grace: Shhh. I’m the one who should be sorry, James. You thought I stopped loving you. But I never did. I loved you with my last breath. Shhh… No more tears.